What Kind of Man Do You Want to Marry?

(Candy Bar Activity)

Have each girl choose a candy bar when she arrives, but don't let her eat it until later (See list below. If you have more than 19 girls, have two of each kind or make up your own). Then describe what kind of man each candy bar symbolizes. Describe attitudes toward work, family, womanhood, motherhood, the Church, honoring the Priesthood, children, etc. After discussing every candy bar man, explain that choosing which man to marry should be done with much more thought than choosing a candy bar. Gather suggestions from the girls or hand out lists of things the girls might consider looking for in a husband. Pass out stationary so each girl can make a list of qualities she's looking for in her future husband.

Remind the girls that it isn't enough just to marry a nice guy, or just a member, or just a returned missionary, or just to get married in the temple. They should make sure that the man they marry is going to be strong and active in the Church and that he has a testimony. Getting married to a man only because he is handsome, strong, athletic, rich, a good dancer, a good kisser, funny, or well-educated is not enough. Though it is nice to have those things, it is more important that you share the same goals and values.

Discuss with the girls that they aren't the only ones choosing a spouse. The young men they are looking at are also looking at them. If they want a solid member of the Church, a returned missionary, a smart, fun, optimistic, creative person to marry, they must make themselves attractive to that type of person by being or doing those things themselves.

Be careful as you present each candy bar man that you don't imply that the girl chose or will choose that kind of man just because she chose that candy bar. Be sensitive to how each man is presented. Some girl's father may partially match one of them. Explain that each girl needs to be wise, think about what she really wants, discuss her choice with family and good friends, and pray to Heavenly Father for guidance when making this crucial decision. She should pick the best man for her.

Have candy bars for refreshments.

Decorate with candy bars, cartoon men, question marks, wedding decorations, bells, doves, netting and lights wrapped together, or pictures of temples, etc.

• Candy Bar for Men

• Candy Bar for Men 2

•   Candy Bar for Women

Candy Bar Men

Contributed by: Monica in Moab gholyoak@lasal.net and Chris Jackson djackson@localaccess.com

BIG HUNK- Here's a real man! He's tall and muscular and good looking with a great smile. He led the high school football team to state championships. No wonder he was voted most valuable player and most likely to succeed. He is the life of the party too. You met him at a youth conference dance. He wasn't very involved in his quorum activities because sports practices and games were often on the same night. He thinks he might serve a mission but hasn't been able to save up enough money to go. He thinks you and he would make a great team. He isn't very good with children, but you know he will feel differently when they are his own.

BABY RUTH- This guy is right in your league. He's really great on the baseball diamond. Speaking of diamonds, he'll give you a big sparkly one. He got good enough grades to stay on the Varsity team in High School and is now playing for the local college. He's majoring in Physical education but doesn't have career plans other than he'd like to make the big leagues, or maybe coach.  His only problem is he developed a habit of chewing and can't quite quit. He says he will quit it for you at the end of this season. He hasn't served a mission because he's afraid the talent scouts might not see him. When he gets drafted , he says he'll be making the big bucks and you'll get married. Until then you could live with his parents. He is very close to his mom and he loves her cooking.

100 GRAND- This guy has it all! Good looks, a wealthy family, and he's a recent convert to the church. He works for his Dad's corporation and will have his master's degree in Business in 6 months. He didn't serve a mission because he just recently joined the church and says he's too old to go on his mission now. He travels a lot and does lots of charity work and feels he can be a missionary that way. He doesn't pay his tithing fully because he donates so much time and money elsewhere that he figures it works out. You feel so proud to be seen with this guy! His parents are divorced and aren't members so he wants to have a civil marriage and then get sealed in the  temple in a year of so.

CHUNKY- This guy is such a nice guy! He's comfortable to be around and everyone likes him, in fact, he was voted most popular in his high school class and was senior class president. He's like a big Teddy bear and gives great hugs. He served a mission and loved the people he worked with in Venezuela. He wants to go back someday with his wife to service another mission. He is in his final semester to get his accounting degree. He has done an internship with a firm and they've offered him a job. Once he passes the CPA exams he will feel comfortable enough financially to buy your ring and take you to the temple. He's so good with managing money and has your budget already set up. He wants to have four or five kids.

SNICKERS- This guy is so much fun. Everything he says is funny. He makes you laugh and you always have a good time when you are with him. He served a mission and is completing his degree in music. He has a band and they play some pretty good gigs on weekends. He works as a shoe salesman right now. He wants to write musical scores for Broadway shows. He wants you to marry him and move to LA to launch his career. He knows that together you can make it and promises you'll only have to work for a few years. Once he makes it you can start a family. You will probably have to travel around a bit but he reminds you that the church is the same everywhere. Besides, he wants to get out of the small town and away from parents and family so you can start your own life your own way. He is so talented and charismatic that you can't wait to be a part of his dream.

POWER BAR-- This guy is so amazing. He treats his body like a temple. He works out regularly and is really built. He's very physically active and observes the word of wisdom to the letter. He's really into health foods and expects his wife will work with him on providing healthy meals and environment. He's a little compulsive about his dress and having things organized. He somehow managed to keep up his fitness while on his mission. He's a physical education major and wants to be a personal trainer and eventually own his own club. This would have to be a 7 day a week business but her thinks he can do that and church too if he's creative with his time management. He would want you to help manage the club with him. He wants to help you become a body builder too. You want to just be able to spend time with him and to please him.

TURTLES-- This guy might not win any races but he's on the right track! He's got a strong testimony of the gospel and served an honorable mission. He can always be counted on to make good his commitments. He may "go turtle" on you once in a while because he's kinda shy. He got over most of that while serving his mission though. He teaches the 13 year olds in Sunday School and is so good with those kids. They love him. He helped your youngest brother learn to ride his bike the other day when he saw him struggling on his own. He's so kind and patient! For your second date, he prepared a delicious meal and served it out under the sky as the sun set. He writes poetry and thinks you would be the perfect mother for his children. He wants to help plan your wedding and keep it focused on the temple sealing. You like his family and have fun playing games with them at Family Home Evenings.

WINTERFRESH- This guy is the coolest! He loves the outdoors and lives for the here and now. He's an avid snow boarder. He knows what's up and is always involved in what's happening. He manages to hold a great job at the snowboard shop as well as go to school. He's in his 4th year of college but has changed his major several times so he has three years to go. He's pretty sure now that he wants to do something in technology. He's glad you have your degree and can support him while he finishes school. He's into junk food so you don't have to know much about cooking. He had experimented a little with drugs in high school but went through rehab and is doing fine now. He does see some R-rated movies but says he only chooses ones that aren't "that bad". His Sunday church attendance is sporadic during the winter months but he goes most of the time in the Summer months unless he's traveling. He think it's cool that you can sew and has you mend his boarding clothes when they get torn.  Your interest in the humanities and home arts will be a good balance for his outdoor interests.

MENTOS-- This guy is such a brain! He is a deep thinker and is a gospel scholar. He really got enthused about gospel study while on his mission.  He didn't have many baptisms but really strengthened his own testimony.  You don't always understand what he's talking about but you think it's great that he is so into the scriptures. It's sometimes hard to get his attention and he isn't much of a communicator but you know it's just because he's so lost in analytical thought. He's gone abroad for a few months each Summer doing post-graduate work on ancient Christian Egyptians. He forgets to write but you know he loves you and things will be different when you have a home and family. He was an only child so you're not sure how he'll handle kids, but he says that he knows that he needs to become a father.

SUGAR DADDY--This guy is always showering you with gifts. He is devoted to you and wants to do anything you ask him to. He supports you in your career plans but reminds you that he will always provide for you so college isn't a necessity. He is so sweet and thoughtful. He works a part-time job and drives a nice car. He has gone to a couple of semesters of college but will inherit his father's real estate brokerage so he doesn't need a degree. In fact, you think his Dad gives him quite a sizable allowance to help him out. He's a little superficial but you figure someone that thoughtful must have more depth than you at first realize. He served a mission in California and is at church by your side most every Sunday unless he's doing an open house for his Dad. He has a bit of a temper but he always apologizes after he cools down. He plans to build you a big home and entertain friends a lot. He wants you to learn how to play the piano and has even paid for you to take cooking classes. He says that he loves to be seen with you and wants you with him forever.

ROCKY ROAD -- You started dating this guy in high school because he was such a fun guy. He owned a 4 wheel drive truck and every date was an adventure… driving the mountain back-roads with a picnic in a high mountain valley was your favorite. He loves hunting, fishing, rock climbing and mountain climbing. He spends a lot of time on the internet searching for his next big adventure. He has plans to climb the 20 highest mountain peaks in North America before he is 25. He used to talk about a mission but hasn’t said anything about it for the last few months. He graduated seminary and is attending institute regularly and so you hope he is still planning to go. But every time you bring it up he changes the topic to his next mountain quest. He comes from a large family and adores his nieces and nephews and you think he’ll make a great father and scout master some day. You wish he’d make it to church more often but he says… I can’t climb a mountain in a day… or even two…. You are sure you can help him see the error of his thinking and turn his priorities around.

Candy Bar Men 2

Disclaimer: These candy bar men have a hodge-podge of characteristics that I have seen or heard about. These men are not designed to match any real individual, living or dead, and should not be taken as such. These candy bar men are designed to show how each person is a mixture of good and bad traits and to help girls decide which traits they want and which ones they don't.

Oh Henry!--He's nice, honest, but forgetful. He prefers to watch TV rather than have Family Home Evening. He's not very committed to the Church. If he stays up late on Saturday, he doesn't mind missing Church, but he will go at least half of the time and take the kids to activities and chaperone dances. He married you in the temple, but you haven't been there together in several years.

SNICKERS--Anytime you talk about the Church, he makes wisecracks about Joseph Smith or things that are hard for him to believe. He's never read the Book of Mormon. He is a good provider. He is a great kisser. He likes to tell jokes which are pretty funny unless they're about the Church. He's great with kids and your kids adore him, but they're adopting his attitude about the Church. You had a beautiful wedding in a garden. You hoped he'd join the Church because he played basketball with the missionaries on their P-day, but now you think that maybe it was just because he liked basketball.

Idaho Spud--He's been a member all of his life and all of his family are members. He's a hard, honest worker. He's got a strong and simple faith in the Gospel. He's not a terrific dancer, but he honors his priesthood and can give your children blessings when they're sick. He's baptized all of your children so far. He went on a mission and married you in the temple. Now he's balding a little bit, has a pooch, and needs glasses, but he's trustworthy and respectful.

MARS Bar--He's a rocket scientist, really. He loves physics and math. He's also kind of a nut. He's got a quirky sense of humor that not everyone understands, but you like it. He likes camping with the Cub Scouts and loves to design Pinewood Derby cars. He also teaches Gospel Doctrine and seems to know everything about Church History. He has to work late on Friday nights sometimes, but he always makes it up to you. You married in the temple and attend about every other month.

Chuckles--This guy wasn't the cutest guy you dated, but he was the most fun. He never took you out to just a dinner and a movie. He was too creative for that. He proposed to you when you were eating a candlelight dinner on a road median. You found the ring underneath your Washington D.C. temple-shaped strawberry shortcake (where you later married--in the temple, not the cake). He even brought along some ring cleaner so it wouldn't be sticky when he slipped it on your finger. He says he wants 15 kids. You joke with him that you'll have the first eight and he can have the rest. He fun to tease and joke around with. He giggles if you make him laugh really hard. You're not rich, but you get by on his salary.

m & m (More and More)--This guy is very ambitious. He goes to work at 7 am and comes home at 9 pm. Sometimes he works seven days a week, even if he doesn't have to. He even brings his work along on family vacations. You never date anymore. He's too tired and busy for that. You are fairly well off and you have a nice house, but you'd rather that he spent more time with you and the kids. What really breaks your heart is that your children ask, "When is daddy coming back?" You got married in the temple, but you wonder if he remembers what that means, since he doesn't seem to value his family here on earth.

Mamba--this guy was on the BYU ballroom dance team and is a terrific dancer. You go dancing every week. He likes having group parties at your house. He is spontaneous and fun. Sometimes he surprises you by bringing home people for dinner without giving much warning, if any. He is a great father and takes his kids on outings with Dad once a month or so. He isn't that great at paying bills, going grocery shopping, or balancing the checkbook, so you learned to do that. He has a sincere testimony of the Gospel and you got married in the temple.

Granola Bar--This guy loves health food. He's in great shape. He avoids refined sugar, white flour, and exercises daily. He cares about the environment and wears a Save the Whales T-shirt frequently. He loves to learn. He's a little unconventional, but he's very nice. Many of your family activities are athletic ones. You ride bikes and bring your own cloth grocery bags when you shop. He has a testimony of the Book of Mormon and loves doing missionary work. You married in the temple.

Charleston Chew--This guy loves the night club scene. That was fun when you were dating, but now you wish he'd also take on responsibilities for taking care of the house, the kids, etc. He was a member of the Church when you met, but he had a small Word of Wisdom problem, chewing tobacco. You thought he would quit after you got married, but now he drinks, too. Because of that, he feels uncomfortable going to church. It looks like you'll never get to the temple.

Skittles--This guy is very handsome and romantic, but not a member. He thought marriage was "Somewhere Over the Rainbow." Now that he sees that marriage is also a lot of hard work, he doesn't seem interested. He talks about being single again. He doesn't want kids and thinks that you, as a woman, should do all of the work in the house, on the relationship, and everything. He figures, "Hey, I'm earning the money around here!"

Mr. Goodbar--This guy is sweet, handsome, and strong. He is a returned missionary and loves learning about the Gospel. He has very bad vision and already has the extra large print scriptures (the High Priest Version). Without his glasses, he can only make out big, fuzzy, colored blobs around him. He loves children and respects motherhood. He hasn't decided on what he wants to do with his career yet, but he's a hard worker and you're getting by. You got married in the temple.

100 Grand--This guy grew up in a very affluent home. He has a lot of earning potential, but he's not earning much right now. The problem is, he's used to a more affluent style of living and is having a hard time staying within your means. He has a testimony of the Church, but he decided that it was more important to graduate from college than to go on a mission. He took you to the temple.

5TH AVENUE--This guy inherited a lot of money from a rich uncle. He is not a member, but is very charming and handsome. You figured that since he was such a nice guy, he was sure to join the Church. He lets you go to Church and supports you in your callings, but he rarely goes himself. His social circle has lots of parties where they drink champagne. He drinks and suggests that once or twice wouldn't really hurt you, but he isn't pushy. Most of the other women there don't have children or have only one or two. They wonder what you do with yourself all day with 5 children and no nanny.

Big Hunk--This guy was a quarterback at your college. He joined the Church while he was there. You introduced yourself to him on his first Sunday in the student ward. He was good looking and buff. You got married before he had been a member for a year and you are anxiously preparing to go to the temple together. It's hard for him to go to Church every Sunday since now he's playing in the NFL. He works a lot of Sundays and Mondays, but he still manages to get to sacrament meeting most of the time and he reads his scriptures a lot on Sundays. He tells you that when he retires from the game, he'll do charity work and have Sundays off. You're well off and he doesn't mind paying tithing even though it is a huge chunk of money. He loves kids and is so excited that you're expecting a baby soon.

SKOR--This guy is very handsome and cool. He loves sports, especially soccer. He hopes to own a Baskin-Robbins ice cream shop one day. He was a big flirt when you were dating and was physically affectionate with lots of girls. Though he was always morally clean, you still wished that he had saved his kisses and other forms of physical affection for you. He served an honorable mission and took you to the temple.

ZERO--This guy never studied in school and barely graduated. His idea of a good job is working at McDonald's during a non-lunch or dinner rush shift. He doesn't know what to do with his life and he doesn't really care. He spends his time hanging out with a few friends, laughing at old jokes, and watching people. He is a member, but rarely goes. He likes to sing and he could be good looking if he took better care of himself. He wrote romantic things to you in letters and you thought that they were all true. You felt sure that if you could just influence him for good, he could turn his life around. Unfortunately, you married him before he turned it around and he still hasn't changed.

Milky Way--This guy has spectacular dreams. He wants to be a movie star. He wants to be unbelievably rich and tremendously famous. He wants to own a huge, richly decorated home. He also sees himself as a very successful player in the NBA, or maybe in the NFL. Self-esteem is not one of his weaknesses. However, he lacks a plan which would help him reach is dreams, so they are merely fantasies, not real goals. His reality is that he hasn't even graduated from college or a vocational school, though he has attended college for 10 years. You married him, believing in him and his dreams, but as it is now, you're still living the poor student life. If it weren't for your job, you wouldn't have any money at all. He's a great father and very smart and funny. He's just not focused on fulfilling his dreams.

Lifesavers--This man is a lifeguard. He has a great body, a great tan, a great smile, and a helpful personality. He also is a wonderful home teacher and missionary. He has shared the Gospel with many of his friends. So far, 30 have joined the Church. He has a very strong testimony of the truthfulness of the Gospel and it is visible in everything he does. You met him when you were out dancing with your friends. He saw that you weren't having much fun dancing with the man who kept asking you to dance, and realized you were too nice to tell him no. So he stepped in and asked you for the next slow song. You had a lot in common and felt totally comfortable with each other, in an exciting sort of way. When you returned to your friends, you were almost out of breath and deliriously happy. You exchanged phone numbers, dated for 8 months, met each other's families and got engaged. Of course, you got married in your favorite temple. Four children later, you are still madly in love and very happy.

Hot Tamales--This guy was voted "most attractive man" his senior year of high school. He knows he's good looking and considers himself a valuable commodity. However, once you get to know him, he can be down to earth and fun. He joined the Church when he was seventeen and none of his family are members. He's a great dancer and singer. He is reserving his kisses for engagement at least. He wants to be an electrical engineer when he grows up, but right now he's a waiter, putting himself through school. He is trying to avoid school-debt, but it looks like he'll take out at least $5,000 in student loans next semester. He had to cut down on his hours at work so he'd have time to study. He thinks womanhood is very sacred and is excited about being a daddy. He wants to learn how to play the piano. Right now, all he can play is "Heart and Soul." You got married in the temple. You live near his parents, who like the family over for Sunday dinner during Church time. It's a tough balancing act.

These candies would also work well: Sugar Daddy, Sugar Baby, Nerds, Sweetarts, Almond Joy, Mounds, etc.

Just a note on the candy bar men activity-
When we did it we typed up each description and attached it to the candy bars and then
wrapped each one with gift wrap. Each girl chose one when they came in.  It was interesting how they thought they knew what they were getting based on the size or shape of the package.  Then we went around the room and had the girls open their candy bar one at a time and read the description of their husband. A lot of the girls thought they knew what they were getting.  They were surprised that their favorite candy bar wasn't always the best description of the qualities they wanted in a husband. Some were pleasantly surprised as well.  Then we told them that when they choose a husband, they should know his qualities, strengths and weaknesses etc., so they are not surprised after they say "I do."  This was really a fun activity, and opened up a lot of conversation between the girls and leaders. 

CANDY BAR WOMEN

YORK -- This girl wants to live in the big city.  She is from a well-to-do family and highly educated.  She is pursuing a career in fashion design.  She has little to no desire to have children.  But she always looks dolled up and great!  She spends $50/month on makeup alone. She's usually too busy entertaining associates to go to church on Sundays. So religion has been placed on the back burner for now.  You are hoping that someday she will slow down her pace and want to do the things that she should be doing.

MARS -- This girl is CUTE!  She's a little bit spacey - you know, thick in the head.  She doesn't have much common sense, but she is a lot of fun to be with.  She was a cheerleader in high school.  She didn't get the best grades or go to college after high school, but she knows how to work hard.  She has been working as a waitress at the local diner for the last 5 years and thinks it's great!  She gets to see all the people she knows and keeps up on all the gossip.  She loves children and wants to have 8 of them as soon as you marry her in the temple.

GRANOLA BAR -- This girl is SMART!  She spent a lot of time on her education.  She is working for the BLM analyzing cryptogamic soil samples.  She dresses a bit immodestly - she says it's because she is in the hot sun all day and besides she hasn't taken out her temple endowments yet so it doesn't matter how she dresses until she does.  She comes to church every Sunday and plans to marry you in the temple.  Some people don't understand why she runs around hugging trees all the time, but you love her enthusiasm .

MOUNDS -- This girl has one incredible figure!  She was voted Homecoming Queen in high school.  She knows she is beautiful and became a model to put herself through college.  The modeling worked out better than she expected and paid so well that she decided to stick with it. She enjoys traveling and seeing the world.  She was coverted to the gospel while working in France.  She struggles with some of the clothing she has to wear at her job, knowing that they aren't always modest.    But she pays her tithing faithfully.  Sometimes she can't make it to church on Sundays, but she tries hard.  You get to see all of the new temples that have been built around the world.  She knows that it will be difficult when children come along, but you'll work it out somehow.

SWEETARTS -- This girl is nice to everyone.  She never says anything negative about someone else.  You aren't sure how someone can have so much love to spread around. She makes sure the house and kids are neat and tidy all the time.  You have family scripture study and prayer every day and Family Home Evening every Monday.  She is the Primary President.  She's very busy but manages to keep everything organized and running smoothly.  She sends love notes in your lunchbox and makes you feel like you are the most important person in her life.

SKITTLES -- This girl is a bit scatterbrained.  You fell in love with her because she's so spontaneous.  She acts on her whims, sometimes she gets you into financial trouble because she just HAD to have that new Thighmaster as seen on TV.  She spends money when she shouldn't sometimes.  Your house is almost always messy, she isn't big on housekeeping.  She serves in the Young Women and the girls lover because she knows how to have a good time!  You can't have children and it makes her sad sometimes, but you are in the process of adopting a child. You know that she will be an excellent mother.
ALMOND JOY -- This girl was popular with the boys in high school.  She had a word of wisdom problem and eventually became pregnant out of wedlock.  She just didn't feel like following the rules and now she is paying the consequences.  Somehow she managed to finish high school. She is in the process of repenting for the things she has done wrong.  She is trying to raise her daughter, go to college and work to support them.  Sometimes you wish that she didn't have a history with so many guys and had saved herself for you.  But you do love her and her daughter. You are planning on getting married in the temple as soon as the bishop gives her the okay.

HERSHEY’S SPECIAL DARK --  This girl is something special.  She's got a very strong testimony of the gospel.  She is always helping other people.  She's very beautiful and athletic and has a special glow about her.  She graduated from college with a doctorate in Sports medicine.  She waited a long time to get married because she hadn't found the right guy until you came along.  She decided to stay home and raise the children rather than work.  Sometimes you aren't sure if you are going to make ends meet because her student loans are so high.  But you are grateful that your children are being taught values and morals at home with their mother than by someone else.  She likes to hunt, fish and camp (WOW!)  She loves you passionately!

JOLLY RANCHER -- This girl is cute but she doesn't know it.  She grew up on a small farm.  Her father patched everything together with duct tape and bailing twine.  She does the very same thing and it drives you CRAZY!  You frequently tell her to just throw the darn thing away and buy a new one.  You make a good living and can't understand why she is so cheap sometimes. But she keeps on pinching her pennies anyway....the kids will have a good education.  Every once in a while you catch her drinking out of the milk carton - sometimes you think she's straight out of the Beverly Hillbillies.  But she works very hard.  She's a good cook, you have a beautiful yard and a bountiful harvest of homegrown vegetables every year.  She hates getting all dressed up - she likes her jeans, but she will wear a dress to go to church on Sundays. She loves to visit the temple and tries to go twice a month.

100 GRAND -- This gal has it all! Good looks, a wealthy family, and she's a recent convert to the church. She works for his Dad's corporation and will have her master's degree in Business in 6 months. She travels a lot and does lots of charity work and feels she can be a missionary that way. She doesn't pay her tithing fully because she donates so much time and money elsewhere that she figures it works out. Her young man feels so proud to be seen with her! Her parents are divorced and aren't members so she wants to have a civil marriage and then get sealed in the temple in a year of so.

AMAZING -- This girl is truly amazing. She earned her Personal Progress award in record time, having earned it before leaving her beehive class. She then made it a goal to do every value experience in the book. She has memorized the Proclamation on the Family and The Living Christ. She is counting down the days until she is 21 and can serve a mission. She sings in the University choir and has a double major in music and educational psychology. She wants to use music therapy to reach emotionally challenged youth. You have been seeing her off and on and would like to get more serious with her but she keeps reminding you of her goal to serve a mission. You are wondering if you should send her anonymous notes in the mail with quotes from General Authorities about the importance of motherhood and how woman should embrace marriage and motherhood. You are in awe of her and are wondering what it would be like to wait for a missionary.

LIFESAVER – This girl won your heart when she helped you change your tire on your first date. You were impressed she knew what to do and didn’t care that her hands got dirty and she broke a nail. She rescued you once more when you thought your computer crashed and she was able to retrieve your term paper you were sure you had lost. This girl is more than you ever thought a girl could be. She grew up in a single parent family and determined she would be able to support herself and not have to rely on help from others like her Mom had to. You are both in the ward choir and were asked to sing a duet in church… that’s how you came to know each other. She is a wonderful girl and you think you’d like to get to know her better.

ATOMIC FIREBALL -- You have admired this girl from afar. She seems to have it all. She is the captain of the cheer squad and has more energy than any girl you’ve ever met. You watched her at every football game wondering if she is as nice as she is cute. You find yourself sitting near her at a campus devotional and eavesdrop on her conversation. You are amazed to find out she is from the same town as your Aunt and Uncle and use this as a tool to drop in on the conversation. You find out your Uncle was her Bishop and your Aunt her BeeHive advisor. You manage to get a date… which turns into more and more dates. You find out she is the Relief Society President of her student ward and volunteers with the Special Olympics. She is majoring in Nursing but her real ambition is to just stay at home and be a Mom. She wants to follow the counsel of the prophet and desires to complete her schooling so she can support a family if she ever needs to.

POWER BAR – This girl was Student Body President of her Junior high, High school, and is now the Student Body President at the University. She is also at the top of her class majoring in Business Administration. You love dating her because you get to attend all the big functions. You’ve had lunch with Pres. Hinckley, dinner with Senator Orin Hatch, and she promises they’re trying to get Bill Gates to come for a special conference this year. You’re hoping to slip him a resume. You love this girls organization skills and her leadership ability. You are sure she’d make a great mother and super PTA president. But she doesn’t want kids right away. She wants to try her hand in the career world first. She figures with her experience and her high GPA she can earn a 6 figure salary in the first couple years out of school. You want a big family and aren’t sure you can change her mind… but you like the benefits of dating the Student Body President so you keep on dating her. You hope maybe the next Relief Society Broadcast the prophet will say something that will change her mind about the family thing.

Ask the YW what the positive and negative attributes of these "girls" are? Can they change for the better? How??